How to Last Longer in Bed: Simple, Practical Advice

If you’re wondering how to last longer in bed, the dependable answers are simple ones: take things more slowly, breathe deeply, build up your pelvic floor muscles, keep alcohol modest, get stress under control and be open with your partner. Small adjustments to pace and mindset often help more than people imagine. Finishing earlier than you’d like is also very common, and for most men it happens on and off rather than all the time.

Please note: what follows is general guidance rather than medical advice. If the issue keeps happening or is worrying you, talk to a GP or pharmacist. They hear about it constantly, it’s a common concern, and it responds very well to treatment.

Why it happens

There is seldom a single cause. Nerves, excitement, someone new, a long break since you were last intimate, tiredness, stress, alcohol and plain habit can all contribute. Anxiety matters a lot, and it builds on itself: the more you worry about finishing early, the likelier it becomes. That is why several of the tips below aim to calm your head as well as your body.

Now and then the cause is physical, which is another good reason to see a GP if nothing improves.

How to last longer: ten practical tips

1. Take it slower

Hurrying works against you. Give more time to touch, kissing and massage, rather than treating them as a warm-up to get through quickly. A gentler pace eases the pressure and, for most couples, improves the whole evening. Our guide to tantric sex is built around exactly that idea.

2. Breathe into your belly

As arousal builds, breathing usually becomes quick and shallow. Choosing to breathe slowly and deeply, so your belly rises, helps your body calm down. Practising when things are quiet makes it easier to use when it counts.

3. Pause when you need to

Plenty of men find it useful to stop, rest and shift their focus for a short while when they feel close, then continue once the sensation fades. Some doctors refer to this as the stop-start method. Getting the hang of it takes time, and a patient, relaxed partner helps enormously.

4. Build up your pelvic floor

Your pelvic floor muscles are the ones you would use to halt the flow of urine midstream. Training them, often known as Kegel exercises, can give some men better control. A usual routine is to squeeze them gently, keep them tight for a few seconds, let go and repeat several times, a few times each day. Expect results over weeks, not days, and ask a GP or pharmacist where to find trustworthy instructions.

5. Keep alcohol modest

One drink can calm nerves, but more than that usually makes intimacy less satisfying for both of you, blunting sensation and performance alike. If you have an evening planned, stop at a glass or two.

6. Look after stress and sleep

Stress, long hours and too little sleep all wear you down. Regular exercise, time outside and a good night’s rest do more than any trick. If you’re going to a date straight from an exhausting day, allow yourself thirty minutes to unwind first.

7. Take care of your general health

Keeping active, eating fairly well and not smoking all help circulation, stamina and confidence. It isn’t exciting advice, but every bit of it helps.

8. Shift your focus

Intimacy isn’t one event with a single finish line. Giving more time to your partner’s pleasure, to massage and affection, and simply to being together lifts the pressure and makes timing matter much less.

9. Talk to your partner

Talking solves a surprising amount. A light, honest remark such as “I’d like us to take our time” removes the strain of hiding anything, and most partners respond warmly. Our guide to intimacy and connection looks at why openness matters so much.

10. Ignore what you see on screen

Films and adult content paint a badly skewed idea of normal. In real life, intimacy varies enormously between people and between nights, and measuring yourself against performers only piles on pressure.

Myths worth ignoring

• “Think about something dull.” Distracting yourself with spreadsheets or football scores might help for a moment, but it takes you out of the experience and usually makes it less enjoyable for you both. Slowing down while staying present tends to work better.
• “It means you’re broken.” It doesn’t. Most men finish sooner than they’d like at some point, and it says nothing about masculinity or how attractive you are.
• “The internet has a quick fix.” Products sold with bold promises on unregulated websites may do nothing at best and cause harm at worst. The safe route is a pharmacist or GP.
• “The longer, the better.” Partners usually value warmth, affection and attention far above the time on the clock.

When to get advice from a GP or pharmacist

If you finish too soon most of the time, if it has continued for months, if it distresses you or if it’s affecting a relationship, get some advice. The same applies to related concerns, such as trouble with erections, pain, or changes you aren’t sure about. A pharmacist is a sensible first stop, and a GP can look for any underlying cause and explain the options. They have these conversations all the time, and everything stays confidential. Please avoid remedies from unregulated websites, as what they sell can be unsafe.

Lasting longer with an escort

Feeling nervous before a first booking is entirely natural, and our ladies are good at helping people relax. A few things make a difference:

• Allow plenty of time. An hour can feel short when you’re anxious. Two hours, which is usually around £500 with us, lets the evening unfold without anyone watching the clock. Our London escort prices guide has the details.
• Start by talking. Chatting over a drink first helps you both unwind. Ladies who offer the girlfriend experience especially enjoy an unhurried start.
• Think about a massage. Many profiles include massage or tantric massage, and either is a lovely way to ease the pace.
• Be courteous. Our guide to escort etiquette covers everything else.

What you pay is for her time and escortship. Anything beyond that is private, between two consenting adults, and she may decline whatever she isn’t comfortable with. Look through London escorts, then phone or WhatsApp us from the booking page.